Loosing My Soul Suddenly

As what I always like to imagine to have a hot coffee, sitting beside the window and looking at the rain coming down from the sky by playing some soft music; then enjoy it with my soul is a most wonderful moment. However, instead of a cold coffee and few tables inside the main door of a Taiwanese Restaurant (Babu) with a glass divider between the table I sitting at; I still can have this kind of feeling even it was just a few minutes rain on that time. Was hoping the time can stop by there forever but I know it won't and told myself just enjoy the moment on that time. Is this enought???

Sweetest moment pass by very fast...just 1 to 2 hours later. Don't know why so many devil come across my mind suddenly and pushed me to listen to the lyric of a Malay song (Rossa-Aku Bukan Untukmu) in front of my laptop, follow by (Selena-Dreaming of You) and (Coco Lee-Before I Fall In Love) and read through the blog written by a friend of mine; suddenly feel like loosing my soul in the cloudy evening.

Why..why..why? Was been so many years reading peoples' blog and only today feel like want to create my own blog to share my feeling!!! Is it because I'm not longer to be the real of me anymore? Not dare to share my feeling directly to my friends anymore so end up with this blog existence to share my feeling? Is it any secret inside me cannot be tell?

Suddenly feel like wanna leave here and start a new life at a corner of the earth but I can't cause cannot let my lovely parent who are still staying at the place I growth up from to worry me so much again. Even always call back and hear their happiest voice, still can senses they can't let go the worries on me. Feel like wanna hugs you tight and please not worries me so much, life is short...just want you all enjoy the life without worries....I promise will take very good care of myself....

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